Adulthood, Babies, Parenting, RealTalk, Sarcastic, Twins

Wombos Maxima, Indeed…

Although I will concede that ultrasounds are not, in fact, the most reliable of measurement sources at the end of a pregnancy, I’m still reveling in the awesomeness of myself that I’m managing to haul around 10.5 lbs of healthy Delicata girl babies every day now. Yup, 10.5 lbs…Ari measured at 5 lbs even, Dani came in at 5 lbs 8 oz. And I’m not even stuck on bedrest or making everyone around me do everything for me. Pretty badass. And wombos maxima indeed at this point. These not-so-teeny little girls will be making their appearance any day now, at the very most 11 days from now they’ll be evicted if they haven’t shown up by then. And of course, I’m looking as huge as ever lol… 

Being on week 4 now of my maternity leave, I have an inordinate amount of time to waste on Facebook and other junk on my phone, but nothing has been annoying me quite like FB has lately. Maybe it’s because everything annoys me these days…maybe it’s because the people I know really are annoying. Maybe a little of both. I don’t know. But what I do know is I’m about 3 annoying posts away from deleting the app altogether and never looking back. 

I can’t tell what’s the worst – the idiots on my page rambling improperly spelled garbage within a sea of bad grammar, the endless “quiz” nonsense posts that tell you your “5 top FB friends” or your fucking “Disney spirit animal” or whatever the fuck else, or if it’s the self-righteous, “perfect-life” posts from people who clearly have everything figured out (and done right…) It’s all junk at this point to me. Right up there on my list with mom-shaming (or choice-shaming in general really) and having to listen to people chew. Maybe these babies just really need to vacate so I can go back to being a normally cynical person, instead of the hell-beast that pregnancy has once again turned me into. Or at least just give me my wine back, then things won’t bother me so much (or I won’t care if they do lol). 

11 more days…but feel free to come sooner girls. We’re ready 😉